Apologies

Hey pals,
I've been down and out with a throat infection/flu so I haven't been in much of a mood to think or write, so all apologies.
I'll get back to it soon, but I am kinda enjoying lazing at home eating junk and watching DVD's...
I watched Life Aquatic, which is amusing as all hell and Garden State, which consequently converted all my testosterone into a mixture/suspension of wide eyed love. Don't get me wrong, an extremely fine film which I enjoyed to no end. I'm just glad I watched it alone - because I got pretty engrossed in it and became a (for the lack of a better word) sissy.

So um, yeah I guess I'll come back with a serious update soon enough. Thanks for keeping your eyes peeled.

Love you all,

ncpx x

Whose Laughin' Now!

Well I've had an interesting night... went to Abe's party which was fab - everyone was happy as larry despite the chatpiece weather. 

Now for those of you who don't know I have a fierce hatred of being tickled. Maybe a phobia of sorts. Either way I'm tenfold more ticklish this side of Elmo, and you should know by now not to tickle me. Consequences may vary... but especially if you're a douchebag haemhorroid grinch, that will not go down well. 

So uh, the person in question starts harassing the shit out of me. Over and over. And obviously I didn't like it - made obvious enough by my pleas for him to stop and get the fk off me. And yeah.  You guessed it! He wouldn't. In fact he just started getting agressive, and so did I. 

It was time for ncpx to get his Jiu Jitsu on.!

So instead of just telling you this story... I'll give you abit of science and something interesting behind it so you aren't left falling asleep and drooling allover the nice keyboard you got from Officeworks the other day. 

downtime and human 404's

Every person has their ups and downs, and obviously some more extreme, 'better' or 'worse' than others (on both ends of the spectrum). Ofcourse, you and I aren't exceptions. 

So having established that everyone, at some point(s) in their life will go through varying levels of downs in their lives, something has been bothering me - and its this;

...The comparison of ones own pain/suffering/depression to that of others and making decisions based off them. ...

Let me try and give you an example for what I mean. I'm just gonna be straight up and say that I've been getting some mean and major downs, for extended periods, over nearly nothing. Mainly just a collection of shit that decides to avalanche at one time, and linger. Nothing unique from anybody elses problems, you might pass as teenage angst anyway. BUT I'm not here to explain myself or my condition or whatever. My point is this: - while feeling like this, I will go through the thought that there are others way worse off than me.

Don't get me wrong. Ofcourse there are. I don't know if I can speak for others when I say this but I've certainly been brought up in a family and a culture where if something bad happens to you, you aren't to sit and reflect over the negative. You're to remember those that are worse off, be greatful for what you have and then just get over it with a head held high. This is especially true in my case - where I really can't explain or have anything immediately identifiable that I can pinpoint to be the cause of downs and depressions. As is often the case with the depression of many (keeping in mind that mental disorders and illnesses often come with no warning or obvious cause). 

In a way, a noble and virtuous idea. A common one at that, don't you think? To be thankful for what you have, and to be unmindful of what you don't. 

Having said that, it in no way makes things better for you. 

What I'm trying to say is this; 

...Why should my pain or suffering mean any less to me or people that care about me because that there are others that have it worse?...

Why should you, or me, or anybody feel like that one's problems deserve to be put on the backburner and ignored because much more terrible things happen to others? 

I've been told that just because you haven't been raped, abused, starving on the streets, been poor, lost your job, been mugged (ETC.) doesn't make your pain or suffering any less terrible to yourself. I find this to be so valid on so many levels. Someone else may doubt the way you're feeling because of its indeterminate nature, but if you sure feel like you're up shit creek without a paddle, then you probably are - no matter where everybody elses signs point. 

And just for some food for thought about an associated issue:- according to the World Health Organisation, depression will be the second highest killer in the developed world next to heart disease after 2010. 1 in 6 adults in the US already suffer from clinical depression, and childhood depression rates rise 24% every year. 

Humans in the developed world may expect to have an average life expectancy of over 100 years old and I don't believe we have to wait long in order to see the artifical reverse or prolonging of natural life. But suppose due to the mental state that the social climate creates, human beings simply will lose the will to live that long?

I'm not trying to say that people will eventually start killing themselves before their statistical time is up on a grand scale. What I'm trying to say is that mental issues and depression is on the rise. It's so common and it may not even be something as obvious as violence and abuse that causes it. It could be our lifestyles, our society, our food AS WELL as the other more obvious causes. 

My final word:- don't belittle your problems, or anyone elses. Fix it now, in ways that you feel are best for yourself. Talk about it, see someone, music - whatever. Just don't feel like you're a nobody because somebody out there actually gives a shit. Including myself .

Things That Destroy ncpx From The Inside - "The Failure 33 Object"

You may or may not have heard of a band called the Red Hot Chili Peppers. If you have read on. If not then I don't know how you access computers under fucken rocks but read on anyway.

John Frusciante of the RHCP makes solo stuff. I don't usually listen to it, but I have a couple of pals that do alot. So naturally I've been made to hear a few stuff out. Not really my cup of tea, but definitely some nice music I could listen to on the occasion.

That is until I was shown

The Failure 33 Object

It doesn't actually have a 'the' title in front of it. But I added it, because it deserves it. It makes it sound like the one and only notorious bowel blastingly cataclysmic 'object' that it is. Yes, it even has a number so you know it's not just ANY failure object.  

So its like how the country Ukraine is actually called THE Ukraine. Ukraine by itself sounds pussy. But when you say THE Ukraine and find it out it means the god damn !FRONTIER!!! then you know that you really shouldn't be fuckin with Ukrain, Ukrainians and it's terrain(..ians) (I'll get back to my raps later)... 

 

Average Ukrainian Male, 8 Years Old

But just incase you aren't quite convinced, allow me to illustrate.

A fine spring afternoon, me and my man Levent are doing a Dominos run to raise our power level, and suppress our hunger.

I realise it's shit. wassup now?

So we're just chillin to the same old music. You know, whatever it is. 

Then it happened. It came on

This musical composition is one crafty son of a bitch. At first, quite lulling and entrancing. A numbing, probing delayed and echoed synthesized arpeggio. 

Intrigued by the riff, I listened on. 

.. and on.

.....and on..

until it was too late.

You remember when Skynet became self aware in the Terminator movies? It wasn't because of Dyson. Fucken FAILURE did it. Skynet is Failure's bitch. The whole arpeggio is actually schematics and code in musical notation form, building upon its self over and over and constructing its own artificial intelligence. Don't beleive me? 
THIS SHIT TURNED UP BY ITSELF.** Because the s.o.b knows that the louder it is the more it HURTS. 

Failure's left nut, magnified x90.

I kicked, I screamed for it to stopped while I clasped my ears and reduced to a foetal position, trapped in a Volkswagen sarcophagus. But it wouldn't stop. It got louder, and louder and relays the same sound over the top of itself over, and over, and over until, this happened.

Thats right, my head exploded. Lev took that on my camera phone, srsly. And before you ask why I'm wearing a fugly yellow shirt, it's because Failure mugged me for my other cool one and gave it to his fucken kids for Christmas. Thats how disgustingly sick he is. He doesn't even need to buy presents for his kids he just jacks people like you and me for our goodies. What a bully!

LUCKILY the pizza came on time, and like the sensou beans of DB I was fed a wholesome thin cheese intravenously , and regenerated my head and decent-shirt again. 

I realise that was alot to digest and so, for every ncpx bane I write about, I will create a brief profile.

THE FAILURE 33 OBJECT - In Brief

Name: The Failure 33 Object

 

The only known photograph of The Failure 33 Object. Gazing into this picture for extended periods of time will most likely put you in a wheelchair.

Age: Aeons. Manifested for the first time on "Shadows Collide With People" February 23, 2004 through mind hijack/symbiotic relationship with John Frusciante after a massive cocktail of cocaine, LSD, rocket fuel and tits (blendered). 

Abilities: Mind hijack / mind probe.

 Artificial intelligence/self awareness

 Excrutiating pain

Description: Lulls the victim into a false sense of security. Victim begins to become entranced and numb by the music. Eventually realising that his/her psyche is being raped, pillaged and looted by a shock squad of caustic techno-bubbles and microprocessors.

Accomplices: Skynet. Fucken, robots. 

Defense Against/Defeating It: Don't allow it to play or build itself. Delete this from your playlists and then destroy your hard drives. Once it plays you are too sprint Carl fucken Lewis style whilst screaming "Jimmy cracked corn and I don't care" at the top of your doomed lungs, in hopes that your mind might forget about it. Though, it is not known whether this is all part of the Object's master plan.

Notes/Remarks: Guys, seriously. This really shouldn't be allowed to exist but it does. I'm scared too okay? 

 

Stranger Danger

Something half interesting has been irking me over past few days.

Basically the idea that a stranger can teach and tell you more about yourself than anyone you have ever known has ever told you in recent times. 

You know how you get those times where you're just feeling bankrupt and void? Pieces don't fit, ends dont meet etc. Yeah pretty much those times where you ask old questions that you want new answers to. And you stay in that mode till you get over it, or until youve got what you were looking for through one way or the other. 

So anyway, I was in one of those. I was just feeling like total shit. Happens right? And through a circumstance I can't quite be bothered to explain, happened to meet a total stranger. So me being me, I spoke to them and spilt guts. They were pretty cool about it, and we spoke and what not. So that doesn't happen often.

But what happened next kinda freaked me out.

This person went on to make a complete observation about me. And told me everything about myself that I suppose already knew, but like I said, when you're in the pits you just don't know things and need some reassurance or new discovery. 

And, it wasn't just six-shooting in the way that you mention the odd trait so that it happens to coincide with yours. No. I'm talkin about a complete "This is what you are like. This is why you are like that. This is what you fear will happen. This is why you fear it." kind of stuff. 

Amused and completely struck at the same time. 

Oddly enough I loved every bit of it. I suppose it's not everyday that strangers can read all over you like a book. I don't consider myself to be a very predictable person and am known to disguise my real feelings pretty well. But, this was just on another level.

As with everything cool that happens. It was short lived, I suppose. But I suppose it just opens your mind? Well, it opened mine anyway. How all of a sudden everything that you turn to, or know, or want to know is completely silent. Yet out of the quagmire of things that don't make sense, someone makes clockwork out of you and you didn't even ask for it. Providence has a funny way of solving things. 

Um, I can explain...

Whats up gangstas?

I've decided to just make a scrap page to write my thoughts and whatever on. To express myself or just to get things out there. 1 reader or 1000 readers, doesn't really matter. I just want to make sure I can express my thoughts and myself in writing.

I'll definitely be taking suggestions/comments and stuff so if you want me to write about a particular something, let me know and I'll see what I can do. This is yours as much as it is mine, because I'm sharing it with you.

Still, that doesn't mean you can come here and screw around with it. Because then I'll just tell you to get the fuck out my office =)

So thanks for reading, and I hope you'll enjoy it and post your comments and thoughts aswell.

Remember to stay tuned! I plan to write more, ofcourse.

Much Love to you and yours, 

ncpx xo